Write Every Day!

i was in the shower when this idea came to mind. it really wasn't a new idea, but one that i've had for quite a while now. i've had a strong disagreement with the way children, and adults are being diagnosed with behavioral problems in the last 10 or so years. i guess it all started with the popularity of ADHD in the news and teachers that felt they had the right to diagnose children themselves. It started there and went onto other ailments that we see as "problems." My feeling is that maybe these instances could be human evolution. The problem is that our society, in it's need for permanence would never consider the possibility. For starters, i'm not trying to make any medical statements, these are all pure observations of those around me and a few definitions i've looked up. My theories could be naive, and i understand there have been years of study to back up other facts, but as the title says, this is a freewrite and it's my blog. :P Now if we ...

Had one of the most meaningful conversations of my life today. I told someone how i feel for a change. He listened - he didn't yell, he didn't berate me, he didn't tell me what i was doing was wrong, he also didn't agree at times and said how he felt. It was amazing! Bleh.... that sounds so flat. I'm invigorated from our words. I feel ten times better than Maria when she was dancing in the dress shop. Things still have to be worked out, each of us has things we have to deal with, but we're doing it together and we're doing it in love. That's all that matters. May good communication spread to all of you out there. ~marj ^__^

It's been quite a while since posting here. With Facebook and other social sites, it's easier to instantly add pictures and comments and rants in one click. The need for immediacy renders the blog almost too time consuming for those with busy schedules. For a while now, i've thought about settling down, trying to steer away from technology and go back to a simpler way of life. With my profession, it may seem impossible, but i'm trying to find the time and resources to do it. Here's what i've been up to lately. Just joined the Tenant's Association at my apartment complex. Since i've signed on for another year's lease, i think i'd like to participate more in what goes on around me at home. I've gone to some of their meetings already and it looks like we may get some work done this year. One of the members of the executive board has also set up mentoring programs for young men. He received interest from women as well and i've signed up...

Strange how writing in this blog doesn't give the same sense of "spilling" my guts anymore. The use of MySpace, then Facebook really took the place of writing longer, more meaningful posts here. Perhaps the need for attention was better fulfilled through the other networking sites. Writing... writing has been on my mind, more so than usual, but the want and will has seemed to leave again. But it's like going to the gym. If you don't go at first, you'll just end up paying month to month without using any of the equipment. When you DO go, you can start a schedule, get used to going and really make use of the money you're spending. I suppose i'm fortunate that i can be in a position to have that decision to make. I really shouldn't take advantage and waste money that way. There are several things i want to do for myself this year. They are not really new year's resolutions because i plan on taking action with each: - go to the library more...

so i figured i'd do a freewrite tonight. esquire.com finally acknowledged the contest if is over(from august 1st :P) but i guess that's how writing contests wrk. i really have to start entering more, but i have to figure out how to get more money into writing. it would really help if i had a higher salary... or maybe i have to start giving up some of the things i'm paying for. hm.. time to study my budget again. not really up to writing much. this weekend will be a moving weekend so long as the hurricane (bill) doesn't get in the way. we'll see. good nigh all.

i love these little impromptu freewrites. today was a good day. not too much coming from the manager - i had a chance to step off the desk and wrok a litle on my own projects. most of you problably don't even know what i do. i'd say i'm a technician, but that's too plain. not really just a technician, but.. cbecause i also do customer srevice. my title is service desk manager, i handl eall the forward facing issues. my fingers are just not typing waht's in my head. hahahaha think of it this way. you're working on your computer, typing away when the A key stops working. what do you do? if you were working in an office, you'd most likely contact your local Help Desk. But do you remember the number? Of course not, you haven't had to contact them since the previous month when your password didn't work. there was no reason to keep that number, you could manage on your own. so, with thebroken A key, you look through your phone books to see if the...

Went to the Upper East Side today. Guess it was a routine visit, going to a book stores tribute to Katya, a dear friend and old neighbor who is performing at Carnegie Hall June 12th. I thought since I was there before that I'd be okay. Thanks to a single song, I was left in tears before the event. You see, music has quite a hold on me. It always has. When I was lonely, music lent some companionship. If I was angry, a hard beat and powerful voice helped release the pressure. If I was sad, I would listen to modern day crooners, mostly broadway ballads, to help the tears flow, then I'd feel a hell of a lot better. And best of all, when I was happy, I could sing along with the rest at the top of my lungs, on key or not. Today, a song came across my iPod playlist and made the memories come flooding back. I was an independent woman, first living with a husband, then on her own on the Upper East. I had the East River to calm me, beautiful music from a neighbor I would meet only after ...